THE BLUE MARLIN:

Case of the

Crimson Cobra

 

An original Radio-Noir Play written for live performance

 

by

 

Marcel Nunis

 

(STAGE VERSION)

 

Second Draft of version 4

Monday, August 18, 1997

ã 1993 Marcel Nunis

This play is protected by copyright. Permission to produce this play and questions about royalty payments may be made directly to the playwright.

Marcel Nunis 416 East Brown Ave. Fresno, CA 93704

(209) 222-0674

 

NOTE TO AUDITIONEERS: This script is still undergoing rewrites. As such, some content will be changed.

 

Main Cast of Characters

 

Maxie Marlin

Veena Kapoor

Cedric

Dragon Queen

Jamal

Mr. Malik

The Girl

Sydney Woo

Frankie Kwai

Inspector Petrus

 

Sundry Characters

 

Waiters

Bellhops

Tour Guide

Sales Person

"The Boys"

Nuns

Checkin Clerk

 

NOTE:

 

The idea for this play is to take the audience from LISTENING to a radio-play to WATCHING one being performed to a play actually being ACTED out. This process of setting up conventions and breaking them down takes about 25 minutes.  As such, the script resembles the fusion of screen and radio formats. This was done to best visualize and approximate the intended style of the piece.

 

To facilitate this effectively, the staging in the original production utilized a presentational style with the only constant being the live musician. This presentational style was fused with a multi-media approach which included slides projected, shadow play, live and recorded sound effects and live and recorded music.

 

Apart from the main characters of MAXIE, THE GIRL and CEDRIC, all the actors played multiple parts. 

 

 Musical Stings, Stabs and Recorded Selections are underlined in CAPS in the left margin. 

 

Sound effects, live or recorded are in CAPS but not underlined.

 

** (E, E,) Stands for Echo Effect.

 

THE BLUE MARLIN: The Case of the Crimson Cobra

Act 1

 

(The stage is set up like a radio studio. 3 microphones sits stage center. Down center is an old radio. Behind that, a scrim for slides to be projected on as well as for ‘shadow plays’ to take place --- an upper screen and a lower screen that can be “opened” to give the impression of a doorway.  Stage right and left platforms enveloped by scrim for live musicians. Below them the other 2 shadow screens.)

 

(The stage is dark. We hear…

 

SNAP SNAP

 

(Lights come up on the musicians playing a prelude. The focus then shifts to one of the shadow screens below them. It depicts a man eating, choking and dropping dead. A cross- fade to another screen in red--- a mysterious female figure laughing. Suddenly we hear…)

 

SNAP SNAP

 

(A musician slapping two pieces of wood together. An actor walks on stage and turns on the radio. The stage suddenly goes dark save a special on the radio. We now hear what seems to be a broadcast coming from the radio.)

 

News announcer

In Singapore today, notorious underworld overlord Woh Tai Koh was found dead from mysterious causes in his hotel room. Authorities speculate that Mr. Woh was in the island republic attending a suspected underworld summit with the heads of various underworld kingpins from the Asian region collectively known as The Syndicate of which Mr. Woh was a leading member.  Police have refused comment. More details on this story as they are made available. The weather today is expected to be rainy and foggy.  And now, back to our regular programming.

 

RADIO STING

 

Announcer

And once again ladies and gentlemen, its time for THE BLUE MARLIN!

 

Maxie stab 

 

Announcer

Yes, THE BLUE MARLIN...Episodes in the life of Fresno's own female detective named Maxie with a whole lot of moxie. Tonight's episode...

STAB

The case of the Crimson Cobra! And now....THE BLUE MARLIN!

 

MAXIE VAMP

 

Maxie

It was one of those Fresno nights when a gal like me toyed with the notion of slippin into a pair of black pumps and skippin this town for good. Business wasn't bad but the office heater was melting my makeup and makin my face feel like a hog’s meal in July. Now, a good sultry heat can usually stir me up a private smile...if you know what I mean. But this season just didn’t feel right with the rain, the fog and Christmas sneaking up around the corner. This time of the year just hasn't been the same since Mom passed on.

Phone

Fred Astaire version of “Lets face the Music & Dance”

 

Maxie

Blue Marlin detective agency. Maxie here. Tell me your story and I'll let you know if you have a case  ...Oh...Hi Dad. Fine..yeah. Yeah,  I’m watching it on the tube right now. Yeah, Fred & Ginger are the best. What? Oh, I've been busy...cases, you know. Mostly wives checking up on husbands ---the usual. Yeah... I know... I 'm careful.... Dad, Dad? Let’s not start this again please? What? Christmas?  Can I call you back on that? I'm just...I'm on my way out. Yeah...I'll talk to you later. Bye.

 

(Once again we hear....)

 

Snap snap

 

(...and the lights come up downstage revealing the actors performing a radio-drama.)

 

Thunder and lightning and rain

I stepped into the damp Fresno night protected by my electric blue trench coat in search of a little R&R. After five cases in a row... and that call from Dad, I needed something. So, I headed downtown. There was a theatre there where an old client and sometime friend---a smarmy Malaysian playwright was producing a new play of his. This was the same guy who once told me that curry eaters make hot lovers....

SIZZLE

.... now if he could only prove it one out of three times it wouldn't be a bad average. Look I'm no push over but I've always been a sucker for an English accent. So maybe I'd catch the show, make my presence felt and perhaps later we could... cook up a little something together.

Applause

MURMURS OF CROWD MILLING ABOUT

 

 

 

Al

Mr. Nunis, Mr. Nunis, Mr. Nunis! What can I say? It was fabulous...wasn't it Kookie?

 

Kookie

Uh ha! Just the cat's meow Al!

 

Al

And the cast. What a cast!  Look, I have a little proposition for you. Now, Kookie and I have always been supporters of the arts. In fact last summer we decided it would be a great idea to...

 

Kookie

But Al, what about that drink you promised me?

 

Al

Sure...sure Honey buns. Lets talk about this over a drink. In fact, why don't I buy you all a drink. The entire cast!

 

Hail Hearty Yelps of delight

maxie bass

Maxie

(DOWN) Something told me the curry principle wasn't going to be put to the test...

out

SIZZLE

...at least not tonight.

in

pumps walking

It was time to cut my losses and head on home. But a tastefully dressed woman with sensible shoes cut off my retreat to my beat up Volvo.

out

sensible shoes fast and stop

Veena

Excuse me Miss? You are Miss Marlin? Miss Maxie Marlin?

 

Maxie

Yes I am. I'm sorry… have we met before?

 

Veena

We have never met Miss Marlin... but you come highly recommended and I am in need of your services.

 

 

Maxie

Look lady, I generally try not to conduct business in a dark parking lot at night.

 

Veena

Yes... I'm sorry.

Crowd emerging

Please we cannot talk here...take this note and meet me in one hour.

 

Maxie

One hour?

 

Veena

It’s all in the note.

 

Murmurs of Crowd milling about

 

Maxie

But...

 

Veena

Please.... one hour.

 

Maxie

Sure. One hour.

 

Sensible shoes quickly away

MAXIE BASS

(DOWN) The note had a name attached to it---Veena Kapoor...it also had the name of a local hangout. I figured I'd make the rendezvous, listen to the schpiel, politely say no and perhaps salvage the rest of the evening.

bar noises

It was crowded when I got there. Livingston's usually was on show nights. (***Add & improvise pretentious dialog here. )  You know...theatre types.  Anyway, I scanned the area and eyeballed the mysterious Miss Kapoor sitting in a dimly lit booth. (UP) Miss Kapoor?

 

Veena

Miss Marlin. I'm so glad you came. I must apologize for my behavior earlier.

I suppose you must be use to frantic clients in your line of work.

 

Maxie

Goes with the job.  Now how can I help you?

 

Veena

That's a very interesting pendent you're wearing.

Ching

It’s an unusual piece and very old I'm sure.

 

Maxie

It’s a family heirloom… something my mother gave me. But, we didn’t meet to talk about my pendant, did we Miss Kapoor? How did you find me?

 

Veena

I...I was guided to you.

Ching

Maxie

Guided huh?

 

Veena

As I said before---you do come highly recommended. In fact, I feel I already know you quite well.

 

Maxie

Yeah, I've known that feeling once or twice myself. So, tell me your story Miss Kapoor and I'll let you know if you have a case.

 

Veena

Veena, please...it’s less formal. And for the proposition I'm about to make---I would be more comfortable knowing I was making it to a...a friend.

 

Maxie

Well, that all depends on the proposition.

 

Veena

How would you feel about an all expense paid trip to the Far East?

 

Maxie

Look, this is all very nice but when I checked this morning it wasn't my birthday. So what gives?

 

Veena

Yes...well, there's something from Malaysia I need you to bring back for me. Nothing illegal. It’s...a family heirloom.

ching

Like your lovely pendent...its something that's been in our family for generations.

 

Maxie

Look, Miss Kapoor...I can give you the name and number of a colleague who

specializes in cases like this...

 

Veena

I would prefer if you handled this yourself.

 

Maxie

This guy handles cases like this all the time and...

 

Veena

No! Miss Marlin, there really is no one else I can turn to ...Please!

$5000 if you accept...and another 5000 when you return. Here is a first class ticket with a return date in two weeks.

 

ching

Maxie

Veena, right?

 

Veena

Yes, Miss Marlin.

 

Maxie

Maxie please...its...its less formal.

maxie bass

(DOWN)  O.K. so this Veena Kapoor was a little intense but she was talking serious Moolah…my kind of language. Besides, she wore sensible shoes.

out

Veena

You will take this case?

 

Maxie

Now Veena, I’ll be getting a first class all expense paid vacation... to pick up...an antique chest of drawers?

snap snap

 

(From this point on the actors begin to drop their scripts and begin "interacting" with each other.)

Veena

This is no chest of drawers. Believe me it is much more.

 

Maxie

Exactly, how much more?

 

Veena

mystical hum

You see Maxie...Its a Crimson Cobra.

 

mystical stab

 

Maxie

A Crimson Cobra?

mystical stab

Veena

Yes...and only one of two exist in the entire world!

mystical stab

It stands about 13 inches tall and both pieces were carved from one solid piece of ruby. Unfortunately, its twin has been lost.

 

Maxie

I see. So, this... heirloom must be a much sought after acquisition.

 

Veena

mystical hum

Yes, but the Crimson Cobra is more than just an exquisite piece of sculpture.

mystical sting

It came from a temple that has long since disappeared. A very powerful temple. In the wrong hands, there's no telling what could be unleashed.

(In the screen we see the figure of a man repeating the dropping dead sequence from the beginning.)

For those obvious reasons, its secret location can only be revealed to you on the night before your return here.

 

Maxie

I see. So what do I do until then?

 

Veena

You will be on… vacation. I have taken the liberty of booking you into some of the most luxurious and exotic locations that part of the world has to offer...and there is the generous fee of course.

hum out

 

Maxie

Yes, lets not forget the generous fee.

 

Veena

So, will you take this case?

 

Maxie

Could you give me a minute to think about this?

 

Veena

Yes, yes. I'm sure all this sounds a little like something that tickles the

 overactive imagination.

 

maxie bass

 

Maxie

(DOWN) The only thing tickling my imagination at the moment was the prospect of going to a part of the world that was populated with curry eaters

sizzle

---lots of curry eaters.

sizzle

This was either some cosmic payback for good karma or I was having a really good hair day.

out

(UP) Well Veena...

 

Veena

Yes...Maxie?

 

Maxie

When do I leave?

 

Veena

Tomorrow...if you agree to one condition.

 

Maxie

Condition? What condition?

 

Veena

I am sure you will have a wonderful time on this trip. But I'm afraid I have to insist this… good time be tempered with some… restraint.

 

Maxie

What do you mean?

 

Veena

You see, because of its mystical stature, the...the bearer of the Crimson Cobra...

 

Maxie

The Bearer… meaning me… should I take this case…

 

Veena

Yes. Now, how can I put this in a delicate way...well, the bearer of the Crimson Cobra has to be...chaste.

bump

Its not a question of virginity mind you...

Maxie

Good. That could have been a little complicated. Chaste huh?

bump

From when to when exactly?

 

Veena

From now until the Cobra is back in my possession.

 

Maxie

And if this bearer is not chaste?

Bump

 

Veena

It would be unwise to tempt the fates Maxie--- extremely unwise. There are certain things we should never question.

 

Maxie

Like always keeping a pair of spare underwear in one’s purse.

 

Veena

Excuse me?

 

Maxie

Its something my mother always told me to do and I've lived by that even until today.  Never questioned it or nothing.

 

Veena

Really? You know Maxie, my own mother always told me to wear clean underwear...and I too have always done so without question.

 

Maxie

Same difference. Us girls...we understand these things. Now that's out of the way.... exactly how chaste are we talking about?

bump

 

Veena

Lets just say...possible romantic encounters on this trip should never develop into intimate ones.

 

Maxie

First base huh?

 

Veena

Please Maxie, it is of the utmost importance this condition be met.

 

Maxie

This is not exactly the kind of vacation I had in mind.

 

Veena

This is a picture of the last person who did not heed this warning.

 

bump, bump

 

Maxie

Ouch! O.K. you've made your point...and an ugly one it is too.

 

Veena

That was my sister… my older sister.

 

Maxie

Your older sister? Older by about 30 years I’m guessing.

 

Veena

She’s actually 2 years older than me. Well, Maxie, are you up to it?

 

Maxie

Veena,...let me just say....I think curry eaters are overrated anyway.

sizzle

 

(Once again we hear...)

 

snap snap

 

(From this point on the actors will "Act " out the rest of the play in a presentational style. Maxie is assisted with her electric blue trench coat.)

 

( The lights dim. The right screen lights up with Slide: The San Francisco Skyline…  revealing the silhouette of a man, John, who seems to be listening to the following on an answering machine. )

 

beep

Voice of Maxie

Dad? Maxie. I'm in town… but I’m calling from San Francisco International. Er... Dad,  something's come up on a case... I can't explain now but it's nothing serious... I'm going to be out of the country so I can't make it for Christmas. Gotta run... my plane is about to leave. I'll try to call from there and I'll see you when I get back in two weeks!

click

 

PHONE

John

Maxie? Oh its you. Yes, I’ve heard… she left a message on my machine. Look, she doesn’t know… she has never known! Yes. I understand there can be no interference but… very well.  I promise there will be no interference… in fact, I’ll gurentee it. (John puts down the phone. Airplane sounds begin. He picks the phone up again.) Hello? Information?

 

Airplane sounds

fade into something swank and colonial (CHECKOUT "TRUTH & BEAUTY" FROM "HEAR MY SONG" SOUNDTRACK)

 

 

(SLIDE: of Singapore is Projected on the top Screen)

maxie

Singapore---Once the crown jewel of the British colonial empire--- now a high-tech island nation with more than its fair share of anal-retentive accountants. The moment I stepped off the plane the steamy, sultry heat affected me like it never did before.

 

(Enter Maxie. A couple of hunky soccer players brush past her. The top screen reveals Veena)

 

veena

Maxie, it is of the utmost importance that the bearer be chaste. (Chaste has an echo effect.)

 

Maxie

And with my newfound limitations there was little relief in sight. Then again, I

was booked into the Raffle's hotel---one of the last remnants of colonial swank and flamboyance... and for now, that seemed like a fair trade.

 

(SLIDE: The Raffles Hotel. Actors who have donned "white" apparel strike a pretentious pose.)

 

Bellhop

The elevators are this way Miss Marlin...

 

(Maxie drops her key.)

Cedric

Here, let me get that for you. (Picks up key and giving it to Maxie.)

 

Maxie

Thanks.

 

Cedric

The pleasure was all mine. Checking in I hope.

Maxie

Yes. Yes, I just did.

 

Cedric

That’s fortunate. I checked in myself about an hour ago.

 

Maxie

An hour ago?

 

Cedric

Yes…

 

maxie

That’s nice. (An awkward pause.) I suppose I should go up to my room now.

 

cedric

Yes, of course. Perhaps we'll have the pleasure of running into each other again...soon.

 

Maxie

Perhaps. (To bellhop) Hey, the rooms here have cold showers, don't they?

 

Bellhop

Yes Miss... hot and cold.

 

Maxie

Cold will do for now.

 

(Exit Bellhop and Maxie. A shady character---Sydney---puts down the paper he is reading and pulls out a cell phone.)

 

Sydney

It’s me. Inform the circle of 21… tell them that the prey has arrived.

 

( Actors clear the stage. Maxie emerging from the "French doors". Enter Cedric.)

 

Cedric

Well, I see we're neighbors.

 

Maxie

What?

 

Cedric

I'm in the room just down the hall. Are you on your way out too? Perhaps we could...

Maxie

No...No, Just coming in.

 

Cedric

Oh?

 

Maxie

Yes...Jet lag!

 

Cedric

Of course.

 

Maxie

Bye! (Enters "French doors". Exit Cedric. Maxie peeks out to see that he is gone.) (DOWN) I could tell that he was going to be trouble---my kind of trouble...but the kind of I couldn't afford to specialize in right now. (Bellhop walks by.) Psst.

 

Bellhop

Yes, Miss... (Maxie beckons the bellhop into the room. Sydney & Frankie sneaks by from around the corner. Looks at the room number and leaves.)

 

(A small table is set up with two chairs. The Actors don formals. Enter Maxie who sits at the table and looks at the menu. Enter bellhop who whispers something in her ear. Enter Cedric in evening formals. Maxie pays the bellhop.)

 

Cedric

Wonderful evening.

 

Maxie

Yes, it certainly is.

 

Cedric

May I?

 

Maxie

I don’t see why not... I was just leaving. (Exit.)

 

 (Two deck chairs are set up. Actors put on shades and get into new swimming pool poses. Enter Maxie who makes herself comfortable in a deck chair.  Enter bellhop who whispers something in Maxie's ears. Enter Cedric bare-chested with shades and towel. Maxie pays bellhop.)

Cedric

Nice day, isn't it? Lovely warm weather.

 

Maxie

Yeah, but it got just a little too warm for me. (Beckoning the Bellhop as she exits.)

 

                        (The next sequence with the Bellhop is a shadow play.)

 

knock, knock

bellhop

Miss Marlin? Room Service. Your breakfast.

 

knock, knock

bellhop

Room service, Miss Marlin...Your dinner.

 

knock, knock

bellhop

Room service. The champagne you ordered?

 

(Emerging from the "French door" screen. Looking around then...)

 

Maxie

After being holed up for 3 days in my room, I decided to brave the sultry weather and catch some of the sights. Still, I wasn't taking any chances and booked myself on a bus tour with a bunch of Irish Nuns.

 

(Two actors with habits set up 4 chairs to simulate the bus and take their places along with the tour guide.)

 

Tour guide

This way please...

 

(The brood gets on the bus.)

Maxie

I had one more day in Singapore and what could possibly happen in one day?

(Enter Cedric.)

 

Tour Guide

There you are sir... we were just about to leave.

 

Cedric

(Sits next to Maxie.)  I see you're on this bus tour as well. How fortunate. I'm Cedric. I guess we're riding together.

 

Maxie

Oh, God!

 

first verse of "on a little street in Singapore"

 

(SLIDE: Scenes of Singapore are projected on to the screen. Possibly a dissolve effect simulating motion.)

 

Maxie

I could take the blue eyes and the fact that he happened to be drop dead handsome. But did he have to have such a dreamy English accent? And did he have to sit next to me?

 

Tour Guide

Ladies and gentlemen, over to your right is the world famous Bugis street and up ahead you can see the Temple of 10,000 Lights.

 

Cedric

You are American, aren’t you?

 

Maxie

Yes. And you're English.

Cedric

Very much so I'm afraid.

 

Maxie

Yeah, so am I.

 

(The song ends as the bus comes to a screeching halt.)

 

Tour Guide

Ladies and gentlemen, we will now stop for lunch. This area is Change Alley---famous all over the world for shopping. We will meet back at the bus in 2 hours.

 

Cedric

Excuse me, would you care to join me for a spot of lunch? Perhaps some curry? I do love a good curry don't you?

sizzle

 

Maxie

No... no thank you. I have some shopping to do.

 

Cedric

Yes, well...some other time perhaps.

 

 

Maxie

Perhaps. (Maxie walks away.)

 

Cedric

(Following her.) First time here...in Singapore?

 

Maxie

Yes. This is my first time. (Walking away.)

 

Cedric

(Following her again.) I've been here several times myself. Know the place quite well actually.

 

Maxie

That’s nice.

 

(SLIDE: The Merlion)

 

Cedric

Perhaps I could show you a little something of the place. A bit of the real Singapore. Now you see that over there? That's the Merlion. An odd creature, don't you think? A lion's head with the body of a fish. (Maxie begins to sneak away. Two Nuns from the bus take her place.) It’s the symbol for Singapore. Legend has it that a Sumatran prince fleeing from assassination landed on this island… its all very romantic really. You see, it was a moonlit night and this prince... (Looks around and Maxie isn't there but the two Nuns are.) Oh.... hello, sisters?

 

Nun 1

And what happened when this prince landed?

 

Nun 2

Yes, do tell us!

 

Nun 1

Please do continue with your fascinating and very romantic story.

 

cedric

Sisters!

 

Nun 2

Yes, please do.

 

Cedric

Well, he came across a lion here…

Nun 2

At this very spot?

 

Cedric

No, actually we’re not quite sure where…

 

Nun 1

But it was somewhere on this island.

 

Cedric

Yes.

 

Nun 2

And then what happened?

 

cedric

Then he called this place Singapura---

 

Nuns

Singapura!

 

Nun 2

Why?

 

Cedric

Why? Why did he call this place Singapura?

 

Nun 2

Yes.

 

cedric

Well, that means Lion City in the Malay language.

 

Nun 2

I see.

 

Nun 1

To come across such a powerful creature underneath the tropical moon. Oh, that is romantic isn't it Sister?

 

Nun 2

Like the Blarney Stone back home.

 

Nun 1

But why does it have a body of a fish?

Cedric

Here, you can read all about it for yourself, sisters.

 

Nun 2

Oh, but its just not the same, is it sister?

 

Nun 1

Yes. Its much nicer being shown around by a personal guide… don’t you think sister?

 

Nun 2

Oh yes sister, it’s so much nicer with a personal guide.

 

 (Exit.)

 

 (The actors don "street" Clothes and a Bazaar is set up on stage.)

 

(SLIDE of Street Vendors.)

 

Chinese sting

Salesperson

Come, come, Missy... Genuine Rolex watch! Only 50 dollar! You my first customer...bring me good luck. For you I give 40 dollar.

 

Maxie

Make it 20.

 

Salesperson

20 dollar? Hai-ya! How can? 35 dollar I give you! This one real Rolex!

 

Maxie

Sure...a real imitation Rolex! $ 20 or no sale.

 

Salesperson

O.K., O.K. 20 dollar lah!

 

Maxie

Nice doing business with you.

 

Salesperson

This one no business. This one you robbing me!

 

Woo

I see you haven't lost your touch Miss Marlin.

gasp

 

Maxie

Sydney, Sydney Woo...

Wood blocks

...and Frankie!

Cowbell

Frankie

Wrong time no see, Miss Marrin!

 

Maxie

I see you're still struggling with that awful R and L substitution Frankie.

 

SYDNEY’S BASS LINE

 

(DOWN) It was that Chinese lizard Sydney Woo Fei Loh and his trusty gecko Frankie Kwai Chee Chak--- both formally of San Francisco's slimy underworld. Sydney was a known white slave trader who was deported a few years back---for smuggling live monkeys into the country.

out

(UP) Sydney, I thought you were exiled in Macao.

 

Woo

No thanks to you. But enough about me...what brings you to the island of Singapore?

Maxie

At least my passport has my own name on it. Do the authorities know you're here?

 

Woo

Singapore is a free port Miss Marlin. Businessmen from all over the world are welcomed here.

 

Frankie

Yes, Miss Marrin...this week we have big businessmen flom arr ove South East Asia...

 

Woo

Shuttup Frankie!

 

Frankie

Solly Boss.

 

Maxie

So Sydney, still trading in Monkeys or have you run out of relatives to sell?

 

Woo

Very witty Miss Marlin...Very Witty indeed. But you are no longer in America so I would be careful with my wit if I were you.

 

Wood blocks

Frankie

Yes,  Miss Marrin...Vely Cearfur indeed.

 

Woo

Mysterious things have a tendency of occurring in the Orient. Unexplained disappearances leaving more questions than answers.

 

Maxie

Did I just hear a threat?

 

Woo

A threat?  I was merely suggesting the return of a favor.

 

Maxie

What favor?

 

woo

A favor you owe me. After all you were instrumental in my apprehension and subsequent deportation from the land of the free.

 

Maxie

Half the police force in the city of San Francisco was instrumental in your deportation Sydney... including my father. Do they all owe you favors?

 

Woo

I collect when the opportunities avail themselves.

 

Frankie

Rike now!

 

Woo

Your testimony was very damaging and we do so miss San Fransisco...

 

Frankie

"I reft my heart in San Flansisco...."

 

Woo

Shuttup Frankie....Sorry Miss Marlin… its too much damn kereoke!

 

 

Maxie

I'm touched... but you brought that on yourself, Sydney.

 

Woo

I beg to differ...

 

Maxie

You can beg all you want...it doesn't change a thing. And I still don’t take bribes.

 

Woo

But we could have worked so well together---you and I.

 

Maxie

In your dreams, Sydney. And just for the record, I owe you nothing.

 

Woo

I'm disappointed. The daughter of the reputable Captain John Marlin refuses to honor a favor. It would break his heart to know this...as much as it broke his

heart when you left the force for... private practice.

 

Frankie

Shame, shame, shame Miss Marrin.

 

Maxie

Lets not talk about my father.

 

Woo

I have always been curious about the circumstances surrounding your untimely … retirement from the San Francisco Police Department.

 

Frankie

Were you a naughty gir, Miss Marrin? Your daddy no rike what you do?

 

Maxie

I said, keep my father out of this!

 

Woo

But you were the one who brought him up...and I am only trying to keep you honest Miss Marlin. Despite our differences I respected your father. In fact, it was a favor I owed him that kept you alive to honor the favor you owe me today.  

 

Maxie

Nice try Sydney...but the way I remember it...you blew your chance when your

 gun ran out of bullets. Remember the sound of the click when you pointed your gun at me and pulled the trigger?

 

Woo

The truth has many sides to it.

 

Maxie

I like my side...yours has too many holes.

 

Woo

Come now Miss Marlin we go back a long way...perhaps you could consider this favor...as a gift. Where is your Christmas spirit?

 

Frankie

"Deck the harrs wit boughs of horry...."

 

Woo

Oh, Shuttup....besides you’re Buddhist!

 

Maxie

Christmas spirit? I’ve checked Santa's list and you've been very naughty...sorry boys, no gift.

 

Frankie

Oh, too bad!  

 

Woo

Frankie!

 

Maxie

But out of curiosity... just how would you suggest I pay back this so called favor?

 

Woo

You are a beautiful American woman Miss Marlin---a valuable commodity in this part of the world. In the spirit of the season...I was only suggesting you spread a little ...goodwill among some gentlemen I know.

 

Maxie

Are these the same kind of gentlemen who would spoon the brains out of a live monkey's skull?

 

Woo

With a splash of brandy, it’s quite a delicacy.

 

Maxie

Once a flesh monger...always a flesh monger, huh? I'm flattered Sydney...but you may have forgotten---I wasn't for sale then and I'm not for sale now!

 

1 block

Woo

But you may have forgotten Miss Marlin---the commodity in this case never determines the buying or the selling.

 

1 block

Frankie

And you may have folgotten---there's two of us and onry one of you!

 

Woo

Good point Frankie.

 

Frankie

Thank you Boss.

 

woo

So lets not make a fuss and come quietly with us.

 

Maxie

I would Sydney, but you may have forgotten one little detail---I know your little secret.

 

2 blocks

Woo

W...Whatever are you talking about Miss Marlin?

 

Maxie

You know,.. that little problem you have.

 

Frankie

Boss, I think she is talking about...

 

Woo

Shuttup Frankie! Problem? Problem...Miss Marlin? (Beginning to breathe hard.) It’s not a problem---It’s a condition!

 

Maxie

Well then, you wouldn't want me to aggravate this... condition, would you?

 

Woo

(Breathing real Hard.) You wouldn't Miss Marlin.... Not here.

 

Maxie

SYDNEY’S BASS LINE

(DOWN) Now old Sydney had a curious...condition. For some strange reason he had an allergic reaction to women's underwear. Even the mere mention of an unmentionable would send him into a violent fit. Must be tough to be put down by something that should have given you a rise in the first place.

out

(UP) Oh look, Sydney....a button just came undone off my blouse.

 

WOo

NO! NO! NOT THAT! (Beginning to wheeze)

 

Frankie

Crose youl eyes Boss! Miss Marrin! Have you no decency? In bload dayright---in the stleet?

 

Maxie

A girl's got to do what a girls got to do, Frankie. Besides he started it.

 

Frankie

But Miss Marrin....

 

Maxie

So Sydney, shall I tell you what I'm wearing under this?

 

Woo

No please no...(Frantic Wheezing.) Don’t tell me anything!

 

Maxie

Are you sure, Sydney? You know when I got out of the shower this morning I thought to myself… I want to feel comfortable and sexy on my tour of Singapore. What could I wear that would feel just… mmm… up against my bare skin. Then it came to me… why don’t I just slip into that little…

 

Frankie

No, Miss Marrin, Preese! Boss, quick cover your ears!

 

Woo

Shuttup Frankie!

 

Frankie

Yes Boss.

 

 

Maxie

No… perhaps it would be better if I show you!

 

Sydney

NO! PLEASE NO!

 

(Sydney's wheezing is fast climbing to a crescendo.)

 

Frankie

I beg you Miss Marrin… Please, No!

 

Maxie

O.K. Sydney, I'll let you off this time. As you said, it is Christmas. See? It’s buttoned again.

 

(Wheezing hits a crescendo and deflates with a shudder.)

 

Frankie

You O.K. boss?

 

Woo

Now Miss Marlin, that was not necessary. We go back a long way...you and I...and your father...this is just a friendly chance meeting of old acquaintances.

 

Maxie

A friendly meeting? Acquaintances? I don't think so.

 

Woo

It would surprise you to know how far back your father and I go.

 

Cedric

(Appearing as a shadow on the Screen.) Miss Marlin? Miss Marlin?

 

Woo

Ah, so you're in Singapore with a friend?

 

Maxie

That is none of your business.

 

Woo

Perhaps we'll all get aquatinted some other time.

 

Maxie

Don't count on it.

 

Woo

Again, that choice may not be yours to make, Miss Marlin.

 

Cedric

(From the Screen again.) Miss Marlin?

 

Maxie

Oh look Sydney, another button just came undone.

 

Frankie

Boss, isn't that....

 

Maxie

And another little button is about to...

 

Woo

Let’s go Frankie! Now!

 

Frankie

Yes, boss!

 

Woo

Perhaps another time, Miss Marlin.

 

Maxie

Don’t hold your breath, Sydney.

 

(Exit Woo and Frankie. Enter Cedric.)

 

Cedric

Are you all right, Miss Marlin?

 

Maxie

Yes, yes, I'm fine.

 

(We see the shadows of Woo and Frankie on the Screen.)

 

Cedric

Perhaps it is fortunate I arrived when I did. There's no telling what those unsavory characters might have done.

 

Maxie

Hardly a problem I couldn't skirt around on my own.

 

 

Cedric

Yes...well...

 

Maxie

But I do appreciate you looking out for me.

 

Cedric

I see that for one so attractive you are wise to the ways of the street.

 

Maxie

You are very … kind to say so.

 

cedric

I say, you have done some shopping. That's a very attractive pendant. Did you get that from around here?

 

Maxie

No, it was a gift from a long time ago. My mother gave it to me.

 

Cedric

Really.  It’s quite exquisite.

 

maxie

Thank you.

 

Cedric

But it pales in comparison to the person wearing it.

 

maxie

I must be on my way... I think I saw some silk bathrobes down the street and…

 

Cedric

Look Miss Marlin I think its only fair to let you know that I find you frightfully attractive and I....

 

Maxie

How did you know my name? I don't recall giving it to you at anytime.

 

Cedric

Our tour guide was kind enough to furnish me with it.

 

Maxie

Oh, she did, did she?

 

 

Cedric

Oh, yes...but she didn't volunteer it, mind you. Not willingly.

 

Maxie

No?

 

Cedric

Not at first. Actually I had to beat your name out of the poor woman and leave her sprawled in an alleyway.

 

Maxie

You're very persistent.

 

Cedric

Yes, I'm sure she thought so too. Do you think the poor dear will ever forgive me?

 

 Maxie

And a bit of a lunatic as well.

 

Cedric

So you've seen through my facade Miss Marlin. Yes, I am a lunatic. Stark raving mad, really. I escaped from an asylum last week, murdered a member of parliament, stole his credit cards and am presently on a worldwide spree of mayhem and murder.

 

Maxie

Is that a fact?

 

Cedric

Absolutely.

Slow Rumba and stop

Now I was about to suggest perhaps dinner and after that a quiet stroll down the esplanade and ...

 

Maxie

Look, before you go any further... I'm very flattered but I have to say no.

 

Cedric

Of course...

 

Maxie

I’m sorry but…

 

 

cedric

No, please forgive me. No explanation necessary.  There probably is a Mr. Marlin somewhere....

 

Maxie

Yes. He's about six three. Works out with weights everyday and is very jealous and extremely protective of me.

 

Cedric

Oh...

 

Maxie

He’s also is very good with firearms. But he does have a sensitive side and we do share a common love for spicy food and old Fred Astaire movies.

 

Cedric

Fred Astaire?

 

Maxie

Yes.

 

Cedric

I'm partial to Gene Kelly myself.

 

Maxie

That’s too bad. Oh, did I mention that he works out with weights every day and is a crack shot with a magnum 44?

 

Cedric

You made that point especially clear. I'm sorry... I didn't mean to...he must be a very special and lucky man.

 

Maxie

Oh yes...and he's also my father.

 

Cedric

Touché. Point well played.

 

Maxie

It's all in the timing. Something....Mr. Marlin taught me.

 

Cedric

Mr. Marlin taught you well. Then, the evening is ours.

slow rumba

We could begin with drinks on the terrace...there's a lovely breeze that blows there…

 

Maxie

But I'm leaving tomorrow and...

 

Cedric

It’s quite splendid. Maughm and Kipling were regulars, you know?

 

Maxie

Maughm & Kipling? I didn't know that...

 

Cedric

Yes, I’ve heard they were never more inspired than when they were in this part of the world.

 

Maxie

But I really cannot... I should not...

 

Cedric

And the dining room---very posh---serves a scrumptious buffet...white linen tablecloths...candles... silverware

 

Maxie

Then again, I suppose we are both on vacation and...

 

Cedric

And the curries....

out

Maxie

The Curries?

bump

No...maybe it’s not such a good idea.

 

Cedric

The Curries?

 

Maxie

The whole thing. I'm sorry.

 

Cedric

Yes, so am I. Look, this doesn't have anything to do with the fact that I'm a raging homosexual, does it?

 

Maxie

No. What? Are you really gay?

 

Cedric

Well...no. But right now I would say just about anything for the opportunity to share a… cocktail with you. At least one.

 

Maxie

You are very persistent.

 

Cedric

Extremely. All I want to do really is… lay my bottle on the lip of your cup and… pour.

 

Maxie

O.K. one drink...that's all.

 

Cedric

On the terrace at eight?

 

Maxie

The terrace at eight.

 

Cedric

Until then, may I show you the sights of this city? We could begin with the store selling silk bathrobes…

 

Last verse of "On a little street in Singapore"

 

(We see silhouettes of Cedric and Maxie "looking at the sights" as slides of tourist spots in Singapore are flashing on the right screen as the stage is being set up for The Terrace Scene. This fades into…)

 

(The left screen. The figures of Sydney & Frankie and members of the Syndicate are in view.)

 

Kingpin 2

You have kept us waiting Mr. Woo.

 

Woo

I’m sorry. I apologise.

 

Kingpin 1

We do not take kindly to tardiness.

 

 

Kingpin 2

Or failure.

 

Kingpin 1

It is our understanding that your trap Mr. Woo did not ensnare “the prey”.

 

Frankie

She got away.

 

Woo

Shuttup Frankie!

 

Kingpin 1

Is this true?

 

woo

Yes.

 

Kingpin 2

Should we offer the open seat in the circle of 21 to someone more worthy?

 

Woo

No. Please.

 

Kingpin 2

We are in a difficult situation, you understand.

 

Kingpin 1

We still have to find a successor for the late Tai Koh.

 

Kingpin 2

But we cannot… we dare not…  not until this little problem is settled.

 

Kingpin 1

We have already lost one. We cannot afford to lose more.

 

Woo

I understand. I will take care of it.

 

Kingpin 2

Then we will keep the seat vacant until you do.

 

Kingpin 1

And if you don’t… you do understand the consequences.

 

Kingpin 2

This Syndicate is made up of some of the most powerful people in this region of the world. Powerful people who cannot afford to lose face.

 

Kingpin 1

And that bitch is holding our alliance and our lives hostage. We do not take this lightly Mr. Woo.

 

Kingpin 1

And neither should you.

 

Woo

I will take care of it.

 

Kingpin 1

And when you do…

 

Kingpin 2

If you are successful…

 

Kingpin 1

Only then will we consider inviting you to sit with us.

 

Kingpin 2

But if you don’t…

 

Kingpin 1

You do realize there will be no where to hide.

 

Kingpin 2

Are we understood?

 

Woo

Yes. Very clearly.

(Exit Kingpins.)

 

Full Slow Rumba

Cocktail sounds

Maxie

(Enter. The Terrace) It was 7:55. A light breeze was blowing, the moon was shimmering off the Straits of Malacca and I was waiting for Cedric to arrive. I tried calling Veena to tell her that I was chucking this assignment... but the circuits were busy. Look, it was more than just the English accent---Cedric made me laugh. For the rest of the day he would surprise me by saying the most absurd, stupid things...and I liked it. He made me feel like a giddy headed schoolgirl---and it’s been a long time since I felt that way...a very long time. (Lights fade.)

out

FULL SLOW RUMBA AGAIN

 

Maxie

(Lights up. Maxie at a table on The Terrace. Silhouettes of people dancing in the Screen.) It was 8:36. The crowd on the terrace had gone in for dinner but I was enjoying the solitude. Dad would have loved this place. It was like something out of a Fred Astaire movie. He and Mom met at a Fred Astaire movie. It sounds silly I know but there was something that made this feel like it was all part of some strange destiny. And I was guessing that Cedric was going to be a big part of it. So he was a little late...or maybe I was early. No matter. The night was still young. (Lights fade.)

 

out

FULL SLOW RUMBA

 

Maxie

(Shockered at her table.) It was 9:15 and all this waiting was beginning to really put a wrinkle in my shorts. 

out

(UP) Waiter!

 

Waiter

Yes mam!

 

Maxie

I think that was 6 Singapore Slings.

 

Waiter

I'll get your bill, Mam.

 

Maxie

Sure. (DOWN) O.K. so I was duped by the sultry heat and an English accent that really wasn't all that hot to begin with. To be honest, he sounded a little like Roger Moore with wooden dentures.

 

Bellhop

(Enter.) Miss Marlin?

 

Maxie

Oh, its you. Is he coming?

 

 

Bellhop

No, Miss Marlin. Message for you.

 

Maxie

Thanks...here.

 

bellhop

Thank You Miss. (Exit.)

 

Maxie

(DOWN) Maybe I figured him all wrong. This was probably a note telling me how sorry he was for standing me up and how he would like to make it up with champagne and a midnight swim and...and...(Pause)

 

Veena

(A Shadow in the Screen reading the telegram .) Maxie, your vacation will have to be cut short, stop. A complication has arisen, stop. Delivery will have to be made sooner than expected, stop. Your contact will meet you in Kuala Lumpur

tomorrow with details, stop. Sorry for the short vacation, stop. I am counting on you Maxie, stop. Only you can do it, stop. Veena.

 

Waiter

(Enter.) Your check, mam.

 

Maxie

Champagne, Midnight swim---yeah right. The only midnight swim I was going to be taking would be in a lonely tub in my room.

 

Waiter

Yes, mam...whatever you say.

 

Maxie

I'm sorry, it’s not your fault. Here. (Putting something on the waiter's plate.) Here. You have a good evening...I was supposed to.

 

Waiter

Thank you...Er...Mam?

 

Maxie

Yeah...

 

Waiter

About this bill, mam…

 

 

maxie

What? You want a bigger tip?

 

Waiter

No Mam...payment for the drinks will be quite enough.

 

Maxie

I’m sure I left enough to cover it…

 

Waiter

Payment is usually made with currency, Mam. (Holding up a black lace number.) This I'm afraid wouldn't even cover much of the woman it was made for.

 

Maxie

What? Oh, I'm sorry. It’s just my mother always told me to... never mind. Here. Keep the change.

 

Waiter

Thank you Mam. And...here...perhaps you should keep yours.

 

(Enter actors who "set up" Maxie's hotel room...scattering clothes around. On the screen we see Maxie coming into the room.)

 

 

Maxie

Perhaps I should go to his room---nah! His loss. Destiny! Have a couple of drinks and suddenly you're a sucker for destiny. “I just want to lay my bottle on the lip of your cup and… pour” Yeah, right! The faster this job was over the better.

 She opens the door, turns on the light and...)

 

mondo stab

phone

Hello?

 

dragon queen

(On the phone. A Shadow in the Screen.) Miss Marlin, If you want to see your friend alive again...meet me in Kuala Lumpur tomorrow night.